Unit 2.50: Defining Anger Management: A Walk-Through of the Process

 Anger Management Defined 

"Anger management is the process of learning to recognize signs that you're becoming angry, and taking action to calm down and deal with the situation in a productive way."  (Mayo Clinic, Jun 10, 2017).

One person suggests that Anger Management is “Finding new ways to handle it so that you don’t cause problems.” 


Per the Mayo Clinic: “Anger management doesn't try to keep you from feeling anger or encourage you to hold it in.  Anger is a normal, healthy emotion when you know how to express it appropriately — anger management is about learning how to do this.”

“You may learn anger management skills on your own, using books or other resources. But for many people, taking an anger management class or seeing a mental health professional is the most effective approach.”

“Why it's done

Anger management helps you recognize frustrations early and resolve them in a way that allows you to express your needs — and keeps you calm and in control.

Some signs that you need help controlling your anger include:

    • Regularly feeling that you have to hold in your anger
    • Persistent negative thinking and focusing on negative experiences
    • Constant feelings of irritation, impatience and hostility
    • Frequent arguments with others that escalate frustrations
    • Physical violence, such as hitting your partner or children or starting fights
    • Threats of violence against people or property
    • Out-of-control or frightening behavior, such as breaking things or driving recklessly
    • Avoiding situations because of anxiety or depression about anger outbursts”


Beginning anger management

When you start working on anger management, identify your triggers and the physical and emotional signs that occur as you begin to get angry. Recognizing and managing these warning signs early is an important step in controlling your anger. Pay attention to and make a list of:

    • Stressors that commonly trigger or worsen your anger, such as frustration with a child or partner, financial stress, traffic issues, or problems with a co-worker
    • Physical signs that your feelings of anger are rising — for example, sleeping poorly, clenching your jaw, a racing heart or driving too fast
    • Emotional signs that your anger is on the rise, such as the feeling you want to yell at someone or that you're holding in what you really want to say

The aim of counseling and anger management classes is to teach you to:

    • Manage factors that may make you more likely to get angry, such as improving sleep so you're not tired and keeping stress low by using stress management skills
    • Identify situations that are likely to set you off and respond in nonaggressive ways before you get angry
    • Learn specific skills to use in situations likely to trigger your anger
    • Recognize when you aren't thinking logically about a situation, and correct your thinking
    • Calm yourself down when you begin to feel upset, for example, by using relaxation skills or taking a break
    • Express your feelings and needs assertively (but not aggressively) in situations that make you feel angry
    • Focus on problem-solving in frustrating situations — instead of using energy to be angry, you'll learn how to redirect your energy to resolve the situation
    • Communicate effectively to defuse anger and resolve conflicts

Results

Improving your ability to manage anger has several benefits. You'll feel as if you have more control when life's challenges turn up the heat. Knowing how to express yourself assertively means you won't feel the frustration of holding in your anger to avoid offending someone.

Anger management can help you:

    • Communicate your needs. Learn how to recognize and talk about things that frustrate you, rather than letting your anger flare up. Knowing how to express yourself can help you avoid impulsive and hurtful words or actions, resolve conflicts, and maintain positive relationships.
    • Maintain better health. The stress caused by ongoing angry feelings can increase your risk of health problems, such as headaches, difficulty sleeping, digestive issues, heart problems and high blood pressure.
    • Prevent psychological and social problems linked to anger. Examples include depression, problems at work, legal difficulties and troubled relationships.
    • Use your frustration to get things done. Anger expressed inappropriately can make it difficult for you to think clearly, and may result in poor judgment. You'll learn to use feelings of frustration and anger as motivators to work harder and take positive action.
    • Help avoid addictive escapes. People who always feel angry may turn to alcohol, drugs or food to decrease feelings of anger. Instead, you can use anger management techniques to keep your cool and maintain control, without adding an additional problem to your life."
      • (Retrieved 6/7/2018, ttps://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/anger-management/about/pac-20385186).  

Roadmapping Solutions To Angry Situations: 

  What might be some really healthy ways to turn on your journey out of an Angry situation given challenges you might face in the meantime.  (For example: "If I try to walk out the door calmly, and she tries to stop me; what would I say or do?")
  If an argument had to happen right now, while I feel extremely Angry; what would I do with my body?  (Would I sit down, Would I yell, Would I fidget, Would turn away and try to Ignore the Other Person?).  And depending on what they do... How should I react that is healthy; versus reacting in a way that could either harm the relationship and/or get me into trouble?




(Compiled by Dr. Beverly, June. 2018)



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